Monday, April 27, 2009

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 7

I am awakened by the sun's fierce glare. I open my eyes drowsily and look around, expecting to see the sun nearby.
I am on my wooden bed, on my comfortable mattress.
I am back in my room.
Disappointment surges through me and I flop back on my pillow.
Had it all been a dream?
It must be. I nearly laugh out loud if not for the deep disappointment. How silly I was to think that it was all real.
I look around my pillow, thinking that the star must have been part of the dream as well.
Sure enough, there was no star.
There is a knock on my door, then my mother enters.
"Wendy, wake up. We have a lot of work to do today."
I nod and she leaves. I close my eyes for a moment and recall the memory of holding the star in my hands.
Ridiculous, really.
Well, it was time to go back to reality.
I climb out of bed and head for the bathroom for a shower.
My mother calls for me to hurry because we are running late. I have a quick shower and dress hurriedly, rushing out the door without making my bed.
Had I looked back, I would have seen a corner of a star peeping from under the pillow.

Friday, April 24, 2009

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 6

I take a tentative step forward. Peter is watching me and smiling encouragingly. I kneel and touch the cloud with my hand. It feels like the softest silk slipping through my fingers. It feels real enough.

My earlier denial is quickly dissipating. This is real. I stand up and begin walking, then skipping across the cloud. I go as close to the edge as I dared to and look down. A city, alive with lights, is sleeping below me.
No, not a city. A whole country. How high up were we?
Peter comes up behind me. He gently places a hand on my back and nudges me forward a little. "You can sit there on the edge. You won't fall."
"Uhm, no. I'm fine."
He laughs. To prove his point, he steps in front of me and walks to the outer edges of the cloud. He sits and carelessly dangles his legs in the empty air.
I am still unconvinced. I am perfectly happy where I am. I sigh and lay down happily, enjoying the silky caress of the cloud on my back. I stare up at the stars for some time, before feeling my eyes grow heavy.
I try to call out to Peter to take me home but my lips refuse to cooperate. My eyes are barely open and I decide to just give in to the floating sensation.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 5

"Will you come play with me tonight?"

I hesitate. The star was a very thoughtful and special gift but he is still a stranger.
Yet, there is something so familiar about him. As if he is a forgotten dream from the past.
He smiles and takes my hand.
"Shall we?"
I nod. I feel sure that I can trust him. He leads me to the window ledge, holding my hand firmly in his.
"Close your eyes," he whispers to me. "And think of the one place you would love to be in right now."
I close my eyes and one image pops into my mind immediately. I frown because it is impossible. I try to think of someplace else, but before I can he is calling to me.
"Wendy, open your eyes."
I do as he says. As soon as my brain registers what I see around me, my knees go weak and I almost collapse.
Almost. I did not fall because he catches me quickly, holding me tightly.
"Peter." The name escapes from my lips. I am surprised. I repeat the name again, looking at him.
He smiles and looks pleased. "You remember."
I shake my head weakly. I still feel shaken and unsteady.
"Not real. A dream," I mumble.
"It is real."
"No. A dream. So long ago." I look around me, half in wonder and half in denial.
He laughs. "This is real."
I look down at my feet. There is no way this is real. It is just not possible.
My bare toes are touching cotton candy.
He lets go of me and sits down on the cotton candy.
This cannot be real. I must have fallen asleep while waiting for him.
He starts playing with the fluffy candy while I have this mental debate with myself.
How else can you explain how I'm standing on a cloud?

Friday, April 17, 2009

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 4

I awake the next morning with a smile. With the arrival of the sun, the star's brightness has faded but there is still a faint glow.

I find myself skipping about the house, which earned my mother's disapproving glance.
"A young lady does not prance about the house like a horse," she scolds me.
I bow my head in a show of regret at her reprimand, but I really bow my head to hide the huge smile on my lips.
The day seems to go on forever as I wait for nightfall.
Finally, darkness creeps into the house and it is time for bed.
I refrain from running up the stairs and force myself to take one small step after the other.
When I reach my room, I rush towards the window and look outside. The moon has come out, and the stars dancing, but there is no sign of him.
I am disappointed. I am surprised that I am disappointed. I sit on my bed and look at the star, which is shining brilliantly once again. I hold it and smile.
I am interrupted by a tapping. This time it is a welcome sound. I look up and, sure enough, there he is.
I walk over to the window to let him in.
"Who are you?"
"You know who I am. You have been calling for me."
I am thoroughly puzzled. He does not look familiar at all. And how could I call on a magical boy when I did not even know magic existed before last night?

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 3

Despite my mother's voice screaming warnings in my head, I walk over to the window. There is something so innocent, yet wicked, about his face that fascinates me. I lift the window and he enters my room.

"Hey!" I snap. The nerve of him! I was only going to have a look at what he held in his hand, not have him flitting about my room.
He stops right in front of me and opens his cupped hand. The angry words disappear as I look down.
I gasp as I see it. There in his hand is the sweetest, most perfect star. It was brighter than any diamond I had ever seen.
"Here," he moves closer to me. "This is for you. To show you that magic is real."
I am frozen. I cannot move. I cannot speak. I am absolutely captivated by the star.
He gently takes my hand and lifts my fingers so they fold around the star.
After an eternity, I finally find my voice. "Thank you."
He nods.
"But, why are you giving me this?"
"Because I want to see you smile."
He gazes at my face for a moment and smiles. Without another word, he leaves my room and leaves me alone.
I walk back to my bed and place the star next to me. I wonder if he will come back tomorrow night.

Monday, April 13, 2009

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 2

I wake early the next morning, feeling refreshed. That immediately put me in a cheerful mood and I begin to go about my day.
However, by lunchtime the cheerful mood was slowly fading. The boy from the night before is persistently in my thoughts, just as he was persistently tapping on my window last night.
I try to push him aside. Unfortunately, this time, Miss Mclachlan was unable to help me block him out.
By bedtime, I am in a foul mood. I have a nice, stable life and am perfectly content with things as they are and this, this boy dares to invade my life? Who does he think he is anyway?
As if he knows that I am thinking about him, the familiar tapping invades my private rant. I turn towards the window. Sure enough, there he is, grinning impishly and looking a right mess.
"Ah, but what an adorable mess," a voice whispers unexpectedly.
The voice in my head.
I frown and watch him as he waves at me. I will not go to him. I am a sensible girl and I do not allow strange boys into my room.
He sees my sour expression and stops tapping and waving. He looks at me for a moment before flying away.
Flying? Hold on, did he really fly? But that's impossible.
"Magic." His reply to my question last night pops into my mind.
I shake my head and tell myself not to be silly. Magic only exists in books and in dreams. Not in real life. I walk back to my bed and climb in.
Just as I am about to turn off the light, the tapping begins again. I look up in surprise. I thought my sour disposition was enough to turn him away.
Apparently not.
He is gesturing excitedly for me to come to him. There is something cupped in the palm of his hand.
I think he wants to show me what it is.
I hesitate.
Do I ignore him again or do I walk over to him?

The Modernisation Of Wendy + Peter P. - Part 1

I'm looking out at the boy standing on the window ledge. He's tapping the glass insistently and is grinning cheekily at me. I'm a sensible girl. I'm not going to let some strange boy walk into my life like that.
But he keeps tapping away, eyes imploring me to open the window. I try to ignore him and hide beneath the covers. Tap, tap, tap. Oh, go away.
But the sound is really getting on my nerves. I throw back the covers and stomp over to the window, glaring at the boy. He stops tapping and starts waving, smiling cheerfully all the while. I lift up the window a little and snap at him, "What do you want?"
"Come play with me," he replies.
I'm ready to explode. "Are you insane? It's way past midnight! And I don't even know you!"
"I can bring magic into your world," he promises.
"How did you even get on the ledge?"
"Magic."
I slam the window shut and close the curtains. He immediately begins knocking on the glass again. I grab my iPod off the desk, crawl back under the covers, slip on the earphones and fall asleep to Sarah Mclachlan.


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Wisdom Of The Ages

Every single time I walk past a shoe store with my mother and stop to peek in, she will say...


"You only have one pair of feet. How many pairs of shoes could you possibly need? You can't wear them all at the same time."

If we subscribe to this notion, I would then only have one top, one pair of trousers, one pair of shoes - basically, one of everything.

But I choose not to follow this particular advice.

Why?

She has more shoes than I do.

It just looks like I have more because she keeps passing her shoes on to me .

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Reflection

I thought I was being quite cute and playful.
I was tired, I was drained, but I tried.
Then some innocent words cracked that already thin surface.
I was not quite so cute and playful anymore.
More like crazy.
A fork clattered loudly onto the floor of an empty restaurant.
One hand covering my face and the other groping wildly for a mirror.
To check for yet another imperfection.
Ah, how can I expect you to think I'm beautiful when I'm a host of so many imperfections?
You think I'm crazy because I would not let you look at me.
I can't look at me, why would I want you to look at me?
Go away.

There's nothing here.

Monday, April 6, 2009

The Magic Is Gone

I used to be afraid of the dark.

I would wake up in a panic if the room was shrouded in darkness.

Now I can only go to bed if the lights are out.

The light irritates me now.

The magic is gone.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

The Things We Do For Love

As I mentioned in my previous post [ a couple of posts back], my friend/ex-housemate from my university days was here for a visit.

So, we were playing tourists. I've been loving the fact that I apparently can pass as a tourist too, so it's been great fun. Anyway, she managed to coax me [or was it coerce?] to visit the Batu Caves. I'm sure you'll find plenty of info on the Batu Caves on Google or Wikipedia.
We climbed about 272 steps of stairs whilst monkeys were freely roaming around practically molesting the visitors. My legs felt like jelly by the time we reached the top [after much whining and whinging on my part about how tired I was, though we completed the climb in under 10 minutes] and I took almost as long going down as going up. My friend stopped for a photo op, and I leaned back against the banisters. Big mistake. My hand touched this soggy, squishy thing which totally grossed me out. It turned out to be a half-eaten rice cake, the remnants of a monkey's meal.
I whipped out my Dettol Wipes [being the germaphobe that I am] and scrubbed my hands. Euwww... Monkey germs!
Once we reached the bottom, I was feeling dizzy from the climb and from the heat and was appeased [or bribed] with an isotonic drink and an Indian sweet. [Gosh, I'm easy.] We went somewhere for lunch before I took her to Petaling Street [also on Google, I'm sure - I'm too lazy to link it] to buy souvenirs.
Honestly, what a difference having a tourist by your side makes. The level of respect [read: greed] in the faces of vendors was palpable. We had to take the side lane because I was afraid she was going to get pounced on. Some guy even referred to us as "pretty ladies" to which my friend replied [under her breath], "Oy, mate. I'm not a lady. My name's Bryan," which left me in hysterics. Also, I was trying to avoid the smoke from a roasted chestnuts cart and nearly got run over by a taxi. Brilliant.
Ah, monkey germs and near-misses. The things we do for love and friendship.

P/S I know this is different from my usual poetry-style posts. Thought I'd give you a break from that. And also show you I'm not such a downer. =D

Thursday, April 2, 2009

The Labyrinth

It's been awhile.


Sometimes I look in the mirror and I like what I see.
More often than not, I don't recognize what I see.
Sometimes I feel like the Ring Master.
More often than not, I feel like a clown.
Sometimes I feel like I hold the world in my hand.
More often than not, I feel like everything is slipping away.
Sometimes I feel like I'm on display at the zoo.
More often than not, I feel invisible.
Sometimes I feel the world around me is going crazy.
More often than not, I feel like I'm losing my mind.
Sometimes I feel like I have all the love in the world.
More often than not, I feel alone.
Sometimes I feel like I'm nice.
More often than not, I feel like the complete opposite.
Sometimes I feel like throwing a glass against the wall.
More often than not, I just keep silent.
Sometimes I feel like I'm home.
More often than not, I want to run away.
Sometimes I feel brave.
More often than not, my resolve crumbles.

Ah, yes.
It's been awhile.